September 29, 2011

potty training

A couple of months ago, I decided it was time for Hannah to be potty trained.  Completely potty trained.  We've tried several times in the last year but every time we would think about starting, something would come up.  This time, I decided there was no turning back and we were going to train until it was done!  And we did.  And it really only took about 2 days!  Hannah was ready and I think that made the world of difference.  She's done great and I couldn't be more proud with how quickly she learned!  But it is SO weird having a toddler in panties.  She is growing's just all happening so quickly these days.

Loaded up on lots of juice and little goodies for the training!

Fun "prizes" for going on the potty!

YAY for big girl panties!  Ready to start training....

First prize for going on the potty...a new Dora book!

Painting to pass the time...

BIG prize on day 2 for no accidents and going #2 in the potty! :)

We braved our first outing after training to Walmart....

And then for some fro yo with our sweet friend Cilla!
YAY for being potty trained!!!

September 27, 2011

2nd anniversary

Our anniversary couldn't have come at a better time this year.  With my miscarriage earlier this month, I wasn't sure how I could even think about celebrating but Jason said we needed to get away and do something fun.  So that's exactly what we did!  We headed to Branson for the night and it was EXACTLY what I needed to continue healing from the whole ordeal.  We stayed at the Branson Landing, ate Cantina Laredo, shopped, watched some football and just enjoyed hanging out and resting.  It was perfect!

 Before dropping this little cutie off with my parents.

 Enjoying a little snack and watching the Alabama vs. Arkansas game.  It wasn't pretty so we only watched the first half and then went out to enjoy Branson Landing.

 Ever watch The Sing Off?  It is one of our favorite shows and it just so happened that The Cat's Pajamas group who had been kicked off the show a few weeks ago were at The Landing for an outdoor musical festival.  They are really good and we enjoyed listening to them!

 Ahhh, Cantina Laredo.  Seriously some of the best chicken enchiladas I've ever had!
 And Jason was stuffed! Ha!

I am so incredibly thankful for Jason!  He has literally been my backbone this year and I definitely couldn't have survived the last month without him.  I feel so lucky and so blessed to be called his wife.  I look forward to many more anniversaries and I can't wait to see where the Lord leads us in our marriage!

September 16, 2011

angel baby

There really aren't words to accurately describe the emotions I have felt over the last month.  I have been happy.  I have been scared.  I have been sad.  I have been angry.  This rollercoaster journey of emotions started about a month ago when I saw this:

We had only been "trying" for a month so I was beyond surprised by this little word popping up!  And even though it wasn't exactly in the plans for right now, we decided to trust God and knew that this baby was a gift from Him.  We were excited at the thought of adding to our family.  I began dreaming of a nursery, picking out baby things again and preparing Hannah to be a big sister.  Jason and I were even talking about how our "plans" for 2012 would change but we were so excited about the future and this little one.

We didn't tell anyone right away because I wasn't sure how far along I was and we wanted to make everything was as it should be before spreading this exciting news. 

I had been spotting (TMI, I know) for a few days over Labor Day weekend and just didn't feel confident that this was going to end the way we were praying, hoping, planning.  (I had told my mom and my sister of the pregnancy at this point.) I first saw my doctor on Wednesday, September 7 with feelings that something was wrong.  I just knew things weren't as they should be.  After an ultrasound, it was confirmed that there was no heart beat and though I should have been about 10.5 weeks, the baby had stopped growing at 6.5 weeks.  I had already cried about the possibility of miscarriage so I wasn't too shocked by this news.  My doctor gave us a little hope that everything could still be fine but she was very honest and didn't expect a different result at my next appointment.  I was scheduled to come back the following Monday for an ultrasound to see if there was a heart beat and develop a plan based on those results.

Thursday morning, I woke up in a lot of pain.  I'll spare you the details but it wasn't a pretty morning.  Jason and I headed to the ER to figure out what was going on.  We knew pretty quickly that I was, in fact, having a miscarriage.  I endured lots of pain, lots of exams and lots of tears throughout the day Thursday.  What I went through in the ER, I would never wish upon anyone.  It. was. awful.  We spent 8 hours in the ER before we were finally released and they said everything was gone and I would be fine.

I went back to my doctor on Monday for a follow-up ultrasound to confirm that, indeed, there wasn't anything left in my uterus.  But there was.  There were lots of blood clots and still a "mass" that needed to be removed.  I had a choice: medication or D&C.  I opted for the D&C at this point because I had already endured the medication of the ER and I didn't want to live through that again.  I was beyond ready for this whole ordeal to be over.  And I was alone at this appointment because I assured Jason Monday morning that everything would be fine and this was just a routine check-up and there wouldn't be any big decisions to be made regarding the "next step".  Wrong.  I will never go to an OB appointment without him again.  So I headed to pre-op and got ready for a D&C on Tuesday.

Tuesday morning, Jason and I headed to the hospital at 10:30 for surgery at 12:00.  Of course, they were running behind and I laid in a hospital bed for nearly 2 hours before being taken back to the OR around 12:45.

 My sweet husband who put up with A LOT this week!

 Jason passed the time waiting in pre-op playing Angry Birds.

Ready for the OR.
Surgery was quick.  Though I don't remember a thing after being wheeled into the OR. Ha!  The first thing I remember was my sweet discharge nurse waking me up, helping me out of bed and seeing Jason and my mom waiting to take me home.  The next little bit was a blur but we did stop for Sonic Happy Hour and Redbox movies.  The perfect way to recover! :)

 Jason and I have been so incredibly humbled and blessed by family and friends who have helped us out SO much over the last week.  We had dinner provided by sweet friends several nights after spending two different days in the hospital.  My mom and dad completely cleaned our house the day I spent in the ER.  They also kept Hannah several nights and gave up their plans so I could rest and begin to heal.  I can't even begin to count how many text messages, facebook messages and phone calls we've gotten from friends, near and far, checking on us and praying for us.  We've had goodies left on our front porch and flowers adorn our kitchen table.  Thank you to each and every person who has been praying for us and helping us.  You are a blessing to our family.
I know this "journey" isn't over.  I know God is bigger than the hurt, pain, sadness, guilt and confusion I feel right now.  I'm glad the physical part of this journey is coming to a close but I know the emotional and mental journey is just beginning.  We trust that God's timing is better than ours.  We trust that He loves us and His plans are PERFECT.  We look forward to the day that we will hold another baby this side of Heaven but we also look forward to the day that we will hold angel baby in Heaven.